Love has a hem to her garment that reaches the very dust.
It sweeps the stains from the streets and lanes, and because it can, it must.
- Mother Teresa
And, on a completely unrelated note,
there is hardly anything more delightful than having a snowflake fall on the very tip of one's nose.
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Healing...
This is a song by a group called Watermark, and as I was listening to it this afternoon, it struck a chord with me (pun intended). God is a perfect redeemer and restorer. Yes, that must be true. Truly, He works to the good of those who love Him and are called according to His purpose.
Father, give me the grace to trust You.
You repair all that we have torn apart and
You unveil a new beginning in our hearts and
We stand grateful for all that has been left behind and
All that goes before us
Chorus:
You've got all things suspended
All things connected
Nothing was forgotten
Cause your love is perfect
You are our healer
And you know what's broken
And we're not a mystery to you(to you, oh Lord, to you)
We will dance 'cause you restore the wasted years and
You will sing over all our coming fears and
We'll stand grateful for all that has been left behind and all that goes before us
-Chorus-
Bridge:
Lord, you mend the breech
And you break every fetter
You give us your best, but what we thought was better
And you are to be praised
You are to be praised (4x)
-Chorus-(to you, oh Lord, mender of the broken)
Father, give me the grace to trust You.
You repair all that we have torn apart and
You unveil a new beginning in our hearts and
We stand grateful for all that has been left behind and
All that goes before us
Chorus:
You've got all things suspended
All things connected
Nothing was forgotten
Cause your love is perfect
You are our healer
And you know what's broken
And we're not a mystery to you(to you, oh Lord, to you)
We will dance 'cause you restore the wasted years and
You will sing over all our coming fears and
We'll stand grateful for all that has been left behind and all that goes before us
-Chorus-
Bridge:
Lord, you mend the breech
And you break every fetter
You give us your best, but what we thought was better
And you are to be praised
You are to be praised (4x)
-Chorus-(to you, oh Lord, mender of the broken)
Sunday, January 25, 2009
1 John 3:19-20 (New International Version)
19This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence 20whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.
19This then is how we know that we belong to the truth, and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence 20whenever our hearts condemn us. For God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.
1 John 3:19-20 (Darby Translation)
19And hereby we shall know that we are of the truth, and shall persuade our hearts before him --
20that if our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart and knows all things.
19And hereby we shall know that we are of the truth, and shall persuade our hearts before him --
20that if our heart condemn us, God is greater than our heart and knows all things.
1 John 3:19-20 (Amplified Bible)
19By this we shall come to know (perceive, recognize, and understand) that we are of the Truth, and can reassure (quiet, conciliate, and pacify) our hearts in His presence,
20Whenever our hearts in [[a]tormenting] self-accusation make us feel guilty and condemn us. [For [b]we are in God's hands.] For He is above and greater than our consciences (our hearts), and He knows (perceives and understands) everything [nothing is hidden from Him].
19By this we shall come to know (perceive, recognize, and understand) that we are of the Truth, and can reassure (quiet, conciliate, and pacify) our hearts in His presence,
20Whenever our hearts in [[a]tormenting] self-accusation make us feel guilty and condemn us. [For [b]we are in God's hands.] For He is above and greater than our consciences (our hearts), and He knows (perceives and understands) everything [nothing is hidden from Him].
Monday, January 19, 2009
This post will probably degenerate into a pity party.
Hmm.
Well, here goes, anyway.
I feel alone. I feel like I don't belong. I feel like I am not capable.
Even though I have friends, I still can't shake this haunting and oppressive feeling of loneliness.
Sometimes I'm afraid that God has abandoned me; He has given up on me.
But I know this isn't true.
And I'm learning to reject a lot of other things that aren't true.
Yes; my relationship with God needs fixing.
Is not my heart broken and contrite enough? How much more does it have to be broken until I am finally, at least in part, healed? Am I not desperate enough? Am I not weary enough?
Am I not trying hard enough? Am I not truly seeking You?
Yes, I have friends. Friends that care deeply. Yet I have no one I belong to, at some level, as a best friend. Shouldn't all of these friends be enough to get me through?
Yes, I am Your child. Yet I am a very useless and weak child.
When will my life make sense again? At all?
When will I find the courage to speak to my father again?
When will Pat get better?
When will I get over how much I miss London?
How do I deal with other, internal stirrings?
How do I make it through the day when I don't really even want to be here anymore, or, rather, know why I'm here? yet don't know where else I want to be? or what I want to be doing?
How do I complete these mounds of reading when my heart and mind are not in sync with each other?
How do I do anything? When I feel incapable of moving in any direction?
When will I know I am loved, and live as if I am?
When?
How?
For what purpose?
I'm bruised and broken, and my soul is very frail.
I do not sense Your presence or care in my tears.
Is this because I am not allowing You in? Or is it part of the refining process?
I don't understand!
Yet somehow, You are my hope. I know You are good.
I want to know You as good.
Hmm.
Well, here goes, anyway.
I feel alone. I feel like I don't belong. I feel like I am not capable.
Even though I have friends, I still can't shake this haunting and oppressive feeling of loneliness.
Sometimes I'm afraid that God has abandoned me; He has given up on me.
But I know this isn't true.
And I'm learning to reject a lot of other things that aren't true.
Yes; my relationship with God needs fixing.
Is not my heart broken and contrite enough? How much more does it have to be broken until I am finally, at least in part, healed? Am I not desperate enough? Am I not weary enough?
Am I not trying hard enough? Am I not truly seeking You?
Yes, I have friends. Friends that care deeply. Yet I have no one I belong to, at some level, as a best friend. Shouldn't all of these friends be enough to get me through?
Yes, I am Your child. Yet I am a very useless and weak child.
When will my life make sense again? At all?
When will I find the courage to speak to my father again?
When will Pat get better?
When will I get over how much I miss London?
How do I deal with other, internal stirrings?
How do I make it through the day when I don't really even want to be here anymore, or, rather, know why I'm here? yet don't know where else I want to be? or what I want to be doing?
How do I complete these mounds of reading when my heart and mind are not in sync with each other?
How do I do anything? When I feel incapable of moving in any direction?
When will I know I am loved, and live as if I am?
When?
How?
For what purpose?
I'm bruised and broken, and my soul is very frail.
I do not sense Your presence or care in my tears.
Is this because I am not allowing You in? Or is it part of the refining process?
I don't understand!
Yet somehow, You are my hope. I know You are good.
I want to know You as good.
Monday, January 12, 2009
The butterfly emerges...
from the cocoon, its wings,
wet with rebirth, slowly opening
and then this creature of fragile loveliness
flies across the blue vault of sky.
--Madeleine L'Engle
The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children. Romans 8:16
From Abba's Child, by Brennan Manning
The sorrow of God lies in our fear of Him, our fear of life, and our fear of ourselves.
God weeps over us when shame and self-hatred immobilize us.
It is uncomfortable and intolerable to confront our true selves.
The impostor tells us to stop being our real selves because nobody likes me as I am.
In Love's service, only wounded soldiers can serve.
We stand in the Truth that sets us free and live out of the Reality that makes us whole.
It is sin to, in our cowardly refusal, to, out of fear of rejection, to think, feel, act, respond, and live from my authentic self.
The deepest desire of our hearts if for union with God.
Prayer is death to every identity that does not come from God.
He is the Savior who saves us from ourselves. His Word is freedom.
I am the Son of Compassion. You belong to Me and no one will tear you from My hand.
We are often tempted to stuff our feelings, shut down our memories, withhold our opinions, and develop social graces.
Sanctity is essentially the nobility of the soul.
Our true self is unself-conscious, unpretentious, immersed in life, absorbed in the present moment, breathing in God as naturally as a fish swimming in water.
Thomas Merton:
"God is asking me, the unworthy, to forget my unworthiness and that of my brothers, and dare to advance in the love which has redeemed and renewed us all in God's likeness and to laugh, after all, at the preposterous ideas of worthiness. ''
Define yourself radically as one beloved of God.
My only desire is to make these words reverberate in every corner of your being--"You are the Beloved"
But you have been so busy trying to prove to yourself yo uare loved that you have not heard me.
Our souls are suffused with glory.
...the God who grabs scalawags and ragamuffins by the scruff of the neck and raises them up to seat them with the princes and princesses of His people
how we view ourselves at any given moment may have very little to do with who we really are
Is my life a disappointment to You? Are You grieved by the shallowness of my soul?
Tenderness awakens within the security of knowing we are thoroughly and sincerely liked by someone.
Oh yes, my Abba is fond of me.
To open yourself to another person, to stop lying about your loneliness and your fears, to be honest about your affections, and to tell others how much they mean to you--this openness is the triumph of the child over the pharisee, and a sign of the dynamic presence of the Holy Spirit.
We have spread so many ashes over the historical Jesus that we scarcely feel the glow of His presence anymore.
The risen One is more intimate to me than I am to myself.
The heart of Jesus beats the same yesterday, today, and forever.
Sloth is our refusal to go on the inward journey--a paralysis that results from choosing to protect ourselves from passion.
The love of Jesus Christ alone establishes status and confers dignity.
Infatuation derives from the Latin in-fatuus--'to make foolish'
I sank down into the center of my soul, grew still, and listened to the Rabbi's heartbeat.
Intelligence without courage is bankrupt.
Anthony of Padua-
Of what value is learning that does not turn to love?
Our love is a need; His is a gift. Thomas Merton
He is not a refuge from reality but the Way into its depths.
The sorrow of God lies in our fear of Him, our fear of life, and our fear of ourselves.
God weeps over us when shame and self-hatred immobilize us.
It is uncomfortable and intolerable to confront our true selves.
The impostor tells us to stop being our real selves because nobody likes me as I am.
In Love's service, only wounded soldiers can serve.
We stand in the Truth that sets us free and live out of the Reality that makes us whole.
It is sin to, in our cowardly refusal, to, out of fear of rejection, to think, feel, act, respond, and live from my authentic self.
The deepest desire of our hearts if for union with God.
Prayer is death to every identity that does not come from God.
He is the Savior who saves us from ourselves. His Word is freedom.
I am the Son of Compassion. You belong to Me and no one will tear you from My hand.
We are often tempted to stuff our feelings, shut down our memories, withhold our opinions, and develop social graces.
Sanctity is essentially the nobility of the soul.
Our true self is unself-conscious, unpretentious, immersed in life, absorbed in the present moment, breathing in God as naturally as a fish swimming in water.
Thomas Merton:
"God is asking me, the unworthy, to forget my unworthiness and that of my brothers, and dare to advance in the love which has redeemed and renewed us all in God's likeness and to laugh, after all, at the preposterous ideas of worthiness. ''
Define yourself radically as one beloved of God.
My only desire is to make these words reverberate in every corner of your being--"You are the Beloved"
But you have been so busy trying to prove to yourself yo uare loved that you have not heard me.
Our souls are suffused with glory.
...the God who grabs scalawags and ragamuffins by the scruff of the neck and raises them up to seat them with the princes and princesses of His people
how we view ourselves at any given moment may have very little to do with who we really are
Is my life a disappointment to You? Are You grieved by the shallowness of my soul?
Tenderness awakens within the security of knowing we are thoroughly and sincerely liked by someone.
Oh yes, my Abba is fond of me.
To open yourself to another person, to stop lying about your loneliness and your fears, to be honest about your affections, and to tell others how much they mean to you--this openness is the triumph of the child over the pharisee, and a sign of the dynamic presence of the Holy Spirit.
We have spread so many ashes over the historical Jesus that we scarcely feel the glow of His presence anymore.
The risen One is more intimate to me than I am to myself.
The heart of Jesus beats the same yesterday, today, and forever.
Sloth is our refusal to go on the inward journey--a paralysis that results from choosing to protect ourselves from passion.
The love of Jesus Christ alone establishes status and confers dignity.
Infatuation derives from the Latin in-fatuus--'to make foolish'
I sank down into the center of my soul, grew still, and listened to the Rabbi's heartbeat.
Intelligence without courage is bankrupt.
Anthony of Padua-
Of what value is learning that does not turn to love?
Our love is a need; His is a gift. Thomas Merton
He is not a refuge from reality but the Way into its depths.
He sends the snow like white wool; he scatters frost upon the ground like ashes.
Psalm 147:16
I reach out for You. I thirst for You as parched land thirsts for rain.
May Your gracious Spirit lead me forward on a firm footing.
Psalm 143:10b
Those who plant in tears will harvest with shouts of joy.
Psalm 126:5
I long for the Lord more than sentries long for the dawn, yes, more than sentries long for the dawn.
Psalm 130:6
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